CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

In Prison

For the next two months I was in prison. I was sick with fever and almost died. Later, when I was better, Mr Kirwin told me that no one could understand the strange, horrible things I said in my sleep. They believed I was crazy. Over and over again, I cried out that I had murdered William, Henry, and Justine. I kept asking people around me to help me destroy "the monster." Often I screamed that I saw his yellow eyes watching me, and felt his fingers around my neck!

When the fever left me and I woke up, I saw that I was in a dark, dirty room. An old woman was sleeping in a chair next to my bed. "Who are you, old woman?" I asked, waking her.

"I am here to help you get well," she said loudly. "But I don't know why you would want to get well, not when you'll spend the rest of your life in prison, or worse, you killer!" I turned away from this unkind woman. No one cared about someone they believed was a killer. However, I learned that Mr Kirwin had sent doctors and nurses to heal me during my sickness. This was very kind, and I wondered if he thought I was a criminal. One day, when I was lying in bed, Mr Kirwin came into my prison room. He asked, "is there anything you need?

I looked into his eyes. They were blue and kind looking. I said, "Sir, thank you, but only death can make me happy now. I do not want to live anymore." "From the papers we found in your pocket, I learned who you are and about your family in Geneva. They are a fine family, aren't they?" I was afraid when Mr Kirwin began to talk about my family. "No!" I cried. "Has anything happened to them? Are my father and Elizabeth all right?" "Your family is well," Mr Kirwin told me. He smiled a little and then said, "and there is someone here to see you." I must have been very sick, because I thought that the monster had come, to tell me about how he had killed Henry. I put my hands over my eyes and shouted, "No! No! Don't let him in! Don't let him touch me!" Mr Kirwin clearly did not know what to think. He said, "All right, but I thought that you would want to see your father."

"Wait! My father has come to see me?" I said.

"Yes, he's right here." Mr Kirwin opened the door and my father came into the room.

I thanked God when I learned that he, Elizabeth, and my brother Ernest were all well. He did not stay long on his first visit because I was so weak. During the next month, my father was able to prove to Mr Kirwin and the other people that I was not in Ireland at the time of Henry's death. He did this by talking to the people in the Orkney Islands, where I had been working on the monster. Immediately, the judges decided that I was not the killer, and they let me go. Now, I knew I had to return to Geneva to protect the few loved ones I had left. I had to kill the monster I had created! He had already ruined my life; I knew I would never be happy again. I would pretend I was happy for Elizabeth and my father, but I would really be miserable. But I had to kill him. My strength was gone, and my body was skin and bones. But I was so determined to go back to Geneva that my father finally agreed. My father had heard some of the things I had said in my sleep while I was sick. He did not understand why I blamed myself for William, Justine, and Henry's deaths. "My dear son," he told me, "You are not responsible for these terrible deaths. Do not say such things again. Elizabeth and I love you, and we want you to rest and get well." I wanted to kill myself at that moment, but I said nothing. My father would never know what kind of a son he had.

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