3. A Working Woman's Dilemma

Dear Doctor,

My husband and I got married in 1965 and for the first ten years of our marriage I was very happy to stay home and raise our three children. Then four years ago, our youngest child went to school and I thought I might go back to work.

My husband was very supportive and helped me to make my decision. He emphasized all of the things I can do around the house, and said he thought I could be a great success in business.

After several weeks of job-hunting. I found my present job, which is working for a small public relations firm. At first, my husband was very proud of me and would tell his friends, "My clever little wife can run that company she's working for."

But as his joking remark approached reality, my husband stopped talking to me about my job. I have received several promotions and pay increases, and I am now making more money than he is. I can buy my own clothes and a new car. Because of our combined incomes, my husband and I can do many things that we had always dreamed of doing, but we don't do these things because he is very unhappy.

We fight about little things and my husband is very critical of me in front of our friends. For the first time in our marriage, I think there is a possibility that our marriage may come to an end.

I love my husband very much, and I don't want him to feel inferior, but I also love my job. I think I can be a good wife and a working woman, but I don't know how. Can you give me some advice? Will I have to choose one or the other or can I keep both my husband and my new career?

Please help.

"DISTRESSED"